Cassandra Falby Psychotherapy

Individual + Relationship Therapy for Fabulous BIPOC and LGBTQ Humans

Would you like to enjoy your relationship again?

Discover what it could be!



Communication Breakdowns

(I can help you identify and address breakdowns in communication patterns and develop more effective forms of communication so you can be heard.)

Emotional Struggles

(I can help you navigate intense emotions, explore root causes, and develop coping strategies in support of your emotional wellness.*)

Disconnection and Distance

(I can help you recognize and address feelings of disconnection or distance so you can enjoy each other more and and live in greater harmony.)

Ruptures in Trust

(I can help you repair trust within your relationship, understand underlying factors that contribute to trust ruptures so that you can feel more safe and secure.)

Specific Life Events that Need Care & Attention

(I can help provide a supportive container to explore significant life events such as loss, trauma, transitions, or crises by offering tailored interventions so you can feel more grounded and more present in your life.)


Hey there, I'm Cassandra Falby, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Feel free to use pronouns they or she when referring to me. My online practice is based on the unceded Chochenyo Ohlone Land (San Francisco Bay Area). I bring a unique blend of experiences to my practice as a Caribbean American of African descent and a genderqueer femme.

My personal and professional journeys include creative tech environments, various non-profit therapeutic settings, and community cancer care. Over the years, I have had the privilege of working with couples to address unhelpful relationship dynamics, broken trust, identity exploration, chronic illness, and neurotype differences.

In my work with couples, my approach incorporates Gottman Method, Attachment Theory, and some IFS principles. In sessions, I strive to create a collaborative environment, utilizing your relationship's strengths in service of your larger goals.

I firmly believe that everyone deserves the chance to heal and grow. I'd be honored to support your relationship's unique journey (think of me as a warmer, more personable Siri). If you want to see what working together might look like, click the button below to schedule a consultation.

My Relationship Refresh Program will take your readiness for change and move it to action.


Phase 1: Exploring Your Relationship Stories

In Phase 1, we spend time with you to get a deeper understanding of how your relationship got to where it is now and create a plan to move you into the direction of greater friendship and connection. This helps to lay the foundation for what needs to shift in your relationship.

Phase 2:

Recognizing Your Patterns

In Phase 2, we look at how and why the roles of you as a listener and as a speaker are integral to the outcomes of even the most tense conversations. You will learn how to stop conversations that cause harm and how communicate more lovingly.

Phase 3:

Creating New Habits

In Phase 3, you will use your newly acquired tools and skills to understand more about each other to create deeper meaning in your relationship. We will establish your collective plan for change and how to be for unified in your relationship for the long term.

Study shows negative communication patterns can have a negative impact on couples' immune health

  • In 2023, research conducted at The Ohio State University revisited a 2005 study that showed physical wounds may take longer to heal when married couples have brief conflicts.

  • The 2023 study noted that, when one of both members of the couple repeatedly avoid tense conversations, it can lead to negative feelings about their relationship and can give rise to inflammatory response.

  • Regular relationship negativity, whether acute or chronic, is taxing on couples' global emotional health, how they relate to one another, and the degree to which the ongoing negativity compromises their immune systems.

And it's not just married couples who experience stressful communication in their relationshps!

Thoughts on Love

"Love is an act of will--namely, both an intention and an action. Will also implies choice. We do not have to love. We choose to love."

—Bell Hooks

"When you pick a partner, you pick a story. So what kind of story are you going to write?"
—Esther Perel

"Make dedicated, non-negotiable time for each other a priority, and never stop being curious about your partner."

—John Gottman

"A secure love relationship acts as a protective shield when we face monsters and dragons and helps us heal after the dragon has gone.”
—Sue Johnson

Frequently Asked Questions

I've never done relationship therapy before. What can I expect?

We will have an initial session where I listen to and learn about who you are as a couple and what your challenges are. I will meet with you individually to understand your experiences of the relationship. Then we will create a plan that focuses on the areas you’d like to address.

When can I schedule sessions?

Sessions are available Mondays through Thursdays, in the afternoons and evenings.

Do you accept insurance?

I do not accept insurance. However, if your insurance allows you to see out-of-network providers, I can provide you with a superbill that you can submit to your insurance carrier for reimbursement.

How long do sessions last?

The length of each session is 75 minutes.

Are sessions online or in-person?

At this time, all sessions are held online using a HIPAA-compliant telehealth (video) platform. There may be opportunities for in-person weekend intensive sessions in the future.

Are you ready to get started?

Please note that you have the right to receive a “Good Faith Estimate” explaining how much your medical and mental health care will cost. Under the law, health care providers need to give patients who don’t have insurance or who are not using insurance an estimate of the expected charges for medical services, including psychotherapy services.

You have the right to receive a Good Faith Estimate for the total expected cost of any non-emergency healthcare services, including psychotherapy services. You can ask your health care provider, including me and any other provider you choose, for a Good Faith Estimate before you schedule a service.

If you receive a bill that is at least $400 more than your Good Faith Estimate, you can dispute the bill. Make sure to save a copy or picture of your Good Faith Estimate.

©2024 Cassandra Falby Psychotherapy